


Tell more

by mkhhhx



Series: Monsta X Bingo S2017 [1]
Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: Abandoned Work - Unfinished and Discontinued, Angst and Feels, Divorce, F/M, Kid Fic, M/M, Monsta X Bingo, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Single Parents, Therapy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-05
Updated: 2017-08-22
Packaged: 2018-12-11 11:01:30
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,083
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11713044
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mkhhhx/pseuds/mkhhhx
Summary: After his divorce Hoseok needs to complete certain therapy hours and Jooheon is more than willing to help him fix his relationship with his daughter and himself.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> My first entry to the summer Monsta X rarepairings Bingo, for the "Single Parents" square.
> 
> This fic is unfinished and will be left like this for the time being.

“Sir, please fill this short form while waiting for the therapist”  
“Okay”

 

_Name: Shin Hoseok_  
_Sex: Male_  
_Date of birth: 1.5.1993_  
_Place of birth: Anyang, Gyeonggi_

_Family status: Divorced_  
_Children: One daughter_  
_Completed your military service: Yes_

 

_Allergies: None_  
_Medication: None_  
_Surgeries: Appendicitis (2012)_

_Work status: Banker_  
_Education level: Completed master’s degree_

_Exercise: Daily_  
_Smoking: Yes_  
_Alcohol: Rarely_  
_Other drug use: None_  
  
_**Therapist’s Notes:**_

The assistant calls Hoseok to the office and he feels helpless walking inside, the space brightly lit, some toys scattered around the floor and short tables, children’s paintings decorating the light blue walls.  
“Close the door behind you and take a seat, Mr.Shin right?”  
He does as instructed, sitting in a very comfortable looking chair a good meter and a half away from the man, muttering a “yes”.  
“My name is Lee, Jooheon if you prefer and we will work together from now, a pleasure meeting you.”  
Hoseok shakes the extended hand and reminds himself that the man is saying the same words to every new patient stepping inside the room, with the same bright smile and welcoming eyes. He feels safe and nice, because the therapist wants him to feel like this.

“So, Mr.Shin” he places the filled form on his desk and pushes his round glasses up on his nose, “why are you here?”  
Hoseok shrugs, because he doesn’t really know and he doesn’t believe he needs to be there, so he goes for the typical answer.  
“The court decided I need to complete certain therapy hours”  
“Court for what?”  
“My divorce”  
The therapist is writing something down on the paper before turning to him again.  
“Do you want to talk about it? The divorce.”  
“Not really.” He would rather never again think about how much he fucked up again.  
“Would you mind telling me about your daughter then?”

He thinks of what to say about it. It’s the nth time after the divorce he realizes he knows so little about her.  
“Her name is Eunjin, she is seven, she likes her dolls and eating fish…”  
“Do you have a good relationship?”  
“Yeah.” He knows he’s lying, but he won’t tell about his family conditions to a stranger, even if he is supposed to.  
“Does she live with her mother?”  
“She lives with me.”  
“Is she home alone right now?”  
“She is with a friend of mine who keeps her when I can’t after school hours. “

More scribbling down and the therapist takes his glasses off, putting them in his shirt’s pocket. Hoseok doesn’t want to talk more, about anything. He could talk about his work and the restaurant down the street but not about his daughter and the divorce.

“How old are you Mr.Shin?”  
“I am thirty-two.”  
“And for how long have you been married?”  
“Nine years.”  
“I see.”  
Mostly years of working than being a husband he thinks, at least the last couple ones. Thankfully he doesn’t need to pretend he is happily married when out with his friends and coworkers, no more of that.

“Would you like to have our meetings twice every week? If Wednesday and Friday is okay for you Mr. Shin.”  
“Yeah, it’s okay, same time as today?”  
The man nods, opening a calendar with colorful cover to write the dates and times down.  
“We will cut today’s session short, since it’s the first one. My assistant will need some typical information before leaving. “

Hoseok gets the cue to get up, shaking hands with his new therapist one more time and steeping out, where the assistant, also a Mr. Lee as his nametag states is nested on his big leather desk chair working on a computer. The door closes behind him and the assistant notices his presence smiling and taking some papers from a shelve. Everyone in here is so smiley.

“How did it go Mr.Shin?” He asks pushing papers and a pen towards him.  
“It was fine” Hoseok says, filling in the form with his phone, address and other basic contact information. He thinks about the emergency contact and decides Kihyun is the safer option so he writes his phone down, signs and gives the papers back.

“I’m Minhyuk by the way, hope you feel welcomed here, we’ll see you soon”, the assistant adds while Hoseok is walking to the door, waving politely before leaving the building. His car is parked nearby and it takes less than fifteen minutes to return home.

~

“Why do you think they divorced? And moreover he kept the child, he seems so unsuitable to keep a child Joo.”  
“Answering you would be kind of breaking my medical confidentiality duties and also, I don’t really know. And put your feet down for god’s sake.”

Minhyuk withdraws his feet from the desk and spins on his chair. Jooheon never told him much about his patients, even the ones who were actually interesting. The seemingly workaholic guy who was probably divorced by his wife because he was never home is one of their usual cases. What is unusual is that guy keeping the child. But Minhyuk is a simple secretary and supposed not to mess with patients, just keep their records.

Jooheon plops down on the waiting room’s couch, opposite to Minhyuk’s desk and plays with a pen. They have more appointments later in the day and he contemplates closing the office for an hour to go grab something to eat. 

Minhyuk is restless and from the way he moves the computer mouse Jooheon just hopes he’s not playing Overwatch at work, or whatever online game it is that he plays in his free time. Opening his psychotherapy office with his best friend had its perks. Mostly for said best friend who got paid to laze around and order takeout. But since everything run smoothly he had no reason to complain, he had many patients and more than enough to support himself financially.

“Come on, let’s go grab something to eat before the next appointment, I saw a new nice place while coming, we can try.”  
“Just ten more minutes to finish the game.”  
“…I thought so.”

~

He unlocks the front door, ready to find Kihyun and Eunjin napping but instead there is noise coming from the kitchen and he heads there, to find them both on the table, with an extra plate in front of the table’s third chair.

“Hello hyung!” Kihyun happily greets him and he smiles to both of them, taking his tie off and sitting next to his daughter, who just looks at him. He pats her head leaning a bit to meet her eye level. “How was school dear?”  
“Okay.”  
Kihyun expression turns to one of sympathy watching Eunjin moving out of her father’s reach and turning her attention to the plate in front of her.

Hoseok eats too, trying to start conversation but mostly failing, only Kihyun listening and answering him. He gives up completely when Eunjin leaves her plate almost untouched and goes to the living room to watch television and if he was a better father he would ask her to put her dish in the sink or wash her teeth or whatever it is that good parents do but he doesn’t know how and even if he did, his daughter doesn’t even recognize him as a father, she probably thinks they are stuck living together for one reason or the other.

Kihyun takes the dishes to the sink and they stand side by side to wash them.  
“Hey” he whispers “it’s okay, she is just a child, she needs time to adjust to this.”  
“She hates me Kihyun” Thankfully, she loves Kihyun and that makes things a hundred times easier.  
“She doesn’t, she needs you here, for her. Hoseok just try, if you give up now there is no going back, don’t you want to be a part of her life?”  
Hoseok has stopped drying the dishes with the towel and is looking at Kihyun, who talking quickly and he wants to answer that he is trying, but he knows it is not enough and he knows that Kihyun knows this.

“I was thinking of letting her see her mother or even stay there for the weekend, if she wants to.” Hoseok admits to himself that he wishes Eunjin would be responsive to seeing her mother and maybe he can go for a coffee with his ex-wife and talk about some things, like what their daughter likes eating and her favorite toys, he would buy anything for her, if she just for once talked to him and asked or said what she wants and like.  
“The weekend is a good chance to bond Hoseok, at least spend one day with her, go to the cinema or something.”

Kihyun has no children of his own but he practically takes care of everyone in their friendship group and he now continues by taking care of their children too. The third part of their little group from college is Hyunwoo, who doesn’t really needs Kihyun’s assistance since he is much better at dealing with his children and he also has a wonderful wife. Maybe setting a playdate for their children would be nice, since the weather is hot and there are many playgrounds around.

He puts all plans aside to sit on the living room, curious as to what his daughter is watching. Turns out to be some dumb show with talking animals, like most children shows and he dozes off at some point to the static.

He wakes up some time later, a blanket thrown over him and Kihyun drooling on his cushions at the other end of the couch. He checks that Eunjin is in her room playing with her dolls and tells her that he’s going to the basement for a while and she can come if she wants, maybe play there just to have company. She refuses to and he reminds her that Kihyun is sleeping and not to disturb him and come to him if she needs anything.

He opens the basement where his gym equipment is set up and puts on a radio station to slowly start his workout. His energy levels are so low lately that he is usually drenched and out of breath halfway in his usual routine but he tries, fully knowing that if he stops, even for a day it’ll be extremely difficult to start working out like this again. He was always careful with his diet supplements, which he at some point needed and took with a doctor’s prescription but everything starts to take a toll on him. Really, he must be getting old.

Kihyun comes to check on him with a fresh orange juice and asks if it’s okay to leave. Right, Kihyun has his own life and work and Hoseok is selfish for keeping him so much lately. He insists he can take care of Eunjin’s bed time by himself and that they’ll call each other soon.

Just like that it’s late afternoon and he has to put his seven year old to bed.  
“Eunjin” he calls, “let’s drink some milk before bed!” he tries a cheerful tone but all he gets is an “okay”, that’s all she says lately. She used to be so much more talkative before the divorce, mostly with her mother, but with him too.

They wordlessly drink milk together and Hoseok asks if she had her bath yet.  
“Kihyun oppa bathed me.”  
“Do you want me to read you a bedtime story before sleeping then?”  
She stares at him and Hoseok waits for the refusal and tries to convince himself that it’s okay when she leaves her cup and goes to her bed, not even saying goodnight.

He is left to tidy the house, just a few things out of place here and there and sets his alarm early enough to prepare breakfast and help Eunjin get ready for school. He falls on his unreasonably big bed and checks the news before dozing off. He dreams of a happy family, his family, but still, in his wife’s place there is someone else.


	2. Chapter 2

“Mr.Shin, how are you today?” Lee politely asks, playing with his glasses until he puts them back on and smiles showing his dimples. Τhat must be the reason he is so popular with kids, judging from the toys and drawings full of hearts around him.

“Fine, tired”, Hoseok exhales. It’s been a long day.  
“Just finished work?”  
“An hour or so ago, I ate lunch and came.”  
“You usually eat out every day?” the therapist does not have any pens and papers in front of him today, making Hoseok just a bit less stressed, but still feeling like he is trapped in that office and being watched.   
“Sometimes, or I get food for me and Eunjin and we eat together.” It’s not a total lie, he takes food for home, it’s just that usually Eunjin has no appetite and prefers to eat after he is done and laying on the couch.

The rest of their conversation is mostly about his workplace, the coworkers, his studies. He used to think that his diplomas and degrees and good salary are impressive, something to boast about but he doesn’t think like that anymore. He’s getting old in an office answering phones and signing papers, looking at numbers every damn day and last week he found a gray hair on his pillow. He might be scared and panicking, but this too, will pass, nobody needs to know.

Apparently Jooheon seems to know what is going on in his mind and asks if he is stressed. He cannot lie, but neither he makes a big deal out of it, being stressed is just a part of the adult life and working to provide for his family is the only way he knows.

“Have you considered going on vacation?” the therapist asks softly.  
“We usually went somewhere when I and my wife got our annual leaves, rented a house near the beach and took trips.”  
“Has it been long since last time?”  
“Around a year and a half.”  
“Maybe you should consider going somewhere with your daughter.”  
Maybe he does.

He notices the tissues on the desk and wonders how many people have cried sitting on the same chair that he is and how Lee deals with them and if the door is soundproof enough for holding the sobs in the room. If he ever cried in there he wouldn’t want the assistant or other patients outside to hear him. Not that he’s going to.

Forty five minutes pass slowly and Hoseok finds himself stealing glances at the clock, on the wall next to the therapist. The court decided on a minimum of fifty sessions, which is roughly half a year. At least the whole thing is covered by his insurance and these days everybody visits therapists, it’s nothing out of the ordinary and nobody will judge him stepping in and out of the building.

They shake hands again and he goodbyes the other Lee who’s talking with someone else, a young woman probably a patient and mother of the little boy playing with his toy car on the couch.   
  
~

**_Therapist’s Notes:_ ** _Hoseok has a problem connecting with people and talking about his emotions, he is more open to talk about experiences and important, to him life events. The second meeting went as expected and well. Next week we will start touching his divorce, which I suspect is not the bigger problem he has faced and uses it to hide much more serious ones. Discussion about his daughter must start too._

Jooheon shuts his notebook as the door swings open by Minhyuk for his next patient to come. The boy is holding a lollipop bigger than his own hands and Jooheon eyes accusingly Minhyuk who just closes the door leaving them. He’s gonna scold him later.

“How are you young man?” The boy smiles climbing on the chair, his favorite toy soldier on one hand, lollipop on the other and then leaves both at the table besides him. His speech is messy because of a few missing teeth but that doesn’t stop him for talking nonstop for almost half an hour about his week, hoping from one topic to the other, stopping only when he has trouble describing something and they look for the correct words together with Jooheon.

He absolutely loves working with kids, the parents are really the difficult ones. Kids are more intelligent than they get credit for, but still, they are simple to understand when they find the correct words. Their actions are always justified and easy to find what caused them. Children trust and can be trusted.

His notebook is full of notes on parents. Mostly simple things. Some need to work on working less and spending time with their family. Some are still more attached to their own parents than their spouses and children. Others are just irresponsible and immature to be parents. Jooheon feels no empathy for dump people, but what he can do is to make them better parents, for the sake of the new generation.

The little boy’s time is up and his mother takes him by the hand, they have to go to his piano lesson she says. Too much pressure on such a fragile being, it’s just a child, at least he likes piano. Jooheon’s meeting with his mother is scheduled for the next day. He needs to convince her that her son is alright, clever and doesn’t need extra homework and she doesn’t need to worry about his future.

Minhyuk waits for him with two sandwiches and coffee, sitting for once decently on his desk. It’s one of their busiest days, even in the middle of the summer. People expect to visit once and have the therapist solve all of their problems. Once they realize that’s not the case and they are grown enough to solve their own problems and that the therapist can only help in the process they are usually already improving themselves, but it takes time, years even of trying both consciously and not.

~

Hoseok unlocks his front door, feeling a bit lighter after the session, even if they didn’t talk about anything important. Lee just happens to have a calming effect on him. Kihyun and Eunjin are napping and he’s extra careful not to wake them up, sitting alone on the kitchen table to eat the previous day’s leftovers.

He opens his laptop to take a look at his inbox, filled with emails from work, work and more work and some pizza discount coupons, which they never use. He takes a bottle of iced tea and gets comfortable, not realizing that he has been working for a couple of hours until Kihyun is standing next to him, looking at the screen, filled with boring cells with numbers.

“Working?” Kihyun puts his hand on Hoseok’s shoulder, efficiently preventing him from continuing his typing.  
“Yeah, I didn’t want to wake you up, how are you? Take a seat.”  
Kihyun does so, rubbing the sleep off his eyes and Hoseok can hear Eunjin moving somewhere around the house.

“How’s therapy going?”   
“Fine”  
“Do you like your therapist?”  
“He’s nice.”  
“Hoseok.”  
He looks up, avoiding Kihyun’s eyes. His friends have been nothing less than supportive and helpful, always there when needed but Kihyun must be losing his patience with him. He nods, closing the program he’s been working on.   
“Stop making everything about yourself, you are only being an asshole. You are in fault here as much as she is, if not even more. You both acted immature.” Kihyun stops to take a breath, looking less and less calm, but yet, the next time he talks it’s nothing louder than a whisper.   
“She is seven Hoseok, she doesn’t deserve this shit in her life. Have you ever visited her school or talked with her teacher? Because I did, she said I’m her uncle and the teacher asked me what’s wrong with her parents. Stop playing the victim and do what you need to. I am not coming again until you get it together.”

And Kihyun stands up, slowly puts his chair back in place and walks out of the door. Hoseok want to call him to come back, because he needs him in his life but deep down he knows that he needed to do this alone, sooner or later and it already took long enough. From that point on Hoseok tries, really does.


	3. Chapter 3

They’ve been avoiding the topic of his divorce for two months now, along with many other. But Hoseok is tired of this and has decided to give it a shot, it’s his only way out, to save the little left from his family. It’s been already fifteen minutes with Jooheon when he stops talking about his day, equally boring with every other.

“I want to talk about the divorce.” Jooheon’s mouth shifts to a small smile.  
“Okay, I’m listening.” He says and shifts his position to a more relaxed one as Hoseok tenses more and more, trying to find from where to start, he didn’t plan what to say beforehand. Still, he starts, talking awkwardly, his lisp worsening from the stress.

“I met my wife at university, she is a year younger and we had some shared classes. We started dating and eventually got married when she graduated. By that time, we were already living together for a year and a half. I was working as a waiter and we were happy, very happy. We wanted children from the start but it took some more time until I found a more stable job and we had enough financial stability to start a family. Eunjin was born and…it was nice. It was hard but it was nice. My wife did not start working again and naturally I needed to work more hours, I got promotions and we had everything, you know children need a lot and I wanted, I still want Eunjin to have everything she needs.”

He stops and looks out of the window, to the other buildings, some birds, some plants on the windows. He tries not to get emotional but the memories come crushing to him once again, some he didn’t even remember. Jooheon is looking at him with warm eyes and Hoseok wishes he would reach to touch him, just a comforting hand on his shoulder. But Jooheon is a professional and he won’t. He continues.

“I completely trusted her, so much. She took care of our baby girl and had food always prepared to eat all together and we went out to diners or to dance when we had the time. She told me she loved me and I loved her too. For the first four years, our marriage was a very happy one.”

Jooheon doesn’t ask and doesn’t push him. Hoseok doesn’t want to tell the rest of his story, to see the expression of sympathy that always follow. It doesn’t this time.

“I noticed that she started going out with her friends much more. It wouldn’t bother me, since Eunjin was at kindergarten and my wife had more free time. But her friends were many, who I had never seen or heard of again. And I got curious, I opened he cellphone while she was showering once. There were messages…”

Hoseok is tearing up and it feels great, like he has power, like he is not ashamed of how fucked up the rest of his marriage was.

“…from men, many men, sending explicit pictures and messages. I didn’t say anything to her and instead I started spying on her. Her phone and laptop. I saw messages I wish I have never opened. They were making fun of me, one guy was working literally in the office next to mine. I was kind to him until I got promoted once more and fired him. I got tired of her and tried to be spending as little time at home as I could, I didn’t know my actions back then would put such a strain on my relationship with my daughter.”

“That is understandable Mr.Shin. I am not saying it was right or wrong, but it was a humane thing to do.”

Jooheon will probably be surprised with the next humane thing that happened.

“I cheated on her with my high school boyfriend.”

He expects Jooheon’s eyes to go wide but he just makes a small approving sound, nods his head and that’s all.   
“Do you want to tell me more about it and him?”

“We had not kept contact, we broke up when we got accepted in different universities. My wife knew I was bisexual from the start but we never talked about it, maybe she thought I was joking. I found him easily through social media, sent him a message, asked to meet up. I really needed someone that night, I couldn’t bear to sleep on the same bed with my wife. I told her I’ll be out for drinks with colleagues and I went to his house.”

Jooheon is not taking notes. He’ll remember it.

“The next day, when I got back home, a Sunday, she asked for a divorce. I was full of marks, it was obvious I wasn’t out for drinks. I simply accepted it and everything happened fast after that.”  
“How came Eunjin kept living with you?”

Hoseok laughs miserably. The court was a joke.

“My wife told the judge I was sleeping with men, instead of just saying I was sleeping around. My lawyer turned it around and made a point that she has lost her mind and is unfitting to keep the child. The judges agreed with him and I found myself alone with my daughter. My wife was sent to attend psychotherapy too.”

He finds himself crying, the session running late. Jooheon doesn’t urge him out of the door but instead gives him the box of tissues kept on his desk and Hoseok makes a good use of it.

**_Therapist’s notes:_ ** _Mr.Shin is doing extremely well. Details about his divorce were discussed and I hope to continue talking about the matter on our next meeting as well as meet his daughter. Our next goal is to break down all the troubling thoughts and examine ways to start working on them._

~

Hoseok is standing in front of Eunjin’s school gates, other parents around him talking to each other, waiting for the bell to ring as well. He is getting better with his daughter, for the past month their relationship has shifted a lot from what it has been right after the divorce.

Much work needs to be done, but her smile when he picks her from school every afternoon keeps him going. The yard floods with children as the bell rings, some staying for their after-school clubs, the older walking to the bus station and most heading to meet their parents at the gates.

He spots Eunjin with her pink schoolbag, walking with a group of other students and laughing. She goodbyes her friends and Hoseok gets inside the yard to greet her.   
“How was your day sweetheart”  
“We drew our favorite animals!” She responds happily and Hoseok kisses her forehead. He still doesn’t know what her favorite animal is, but he can ask to see the drawing.   
“Are any of your friends staying to play? I need to speak with your teacher for a while, I will be right back.” She nods, pointing at some students that look around her age. Hoseok gets her bag and reminds her to be careful, climbing the stairs to the offices.

He has met Mr.Jung, Eunjin’s teacher only once before, at the start of the year when he attended a compulsory parent meeting. He knocks on his door and the voice from inside welcomes him.   
“Hello Mr.Jung” he politely bows.  
“Hello, please take a seat…and you are?”  
“Shin Hoseok, Eunjin’s father.”  
The teacher’s mouth forms an “oh” with no sound actually coming out, he must not be expecting to see him anytime soon.

“Did you wanted to discuss something specific?”  
“Generally, how my daughter is doing.”  
Mr.Jung opens a heavy folder, filled with papers, separated with colorful bookmarks.   
“Her writing and other skills have improved greatly from the start of the year. Not only that, but she is much more social as well. I have some of her exercises here, if you want to take a look.”  
Hoseok flips through the pages, recognizing the messy handwriting. He’s been helping Eunjin with homework lately. Her drawings have more color and the exercises better marks towards the end of the entries.

“I know she’s had some tough times Mr.Shin, I am sorry for your divorce and what you have both been through, there are many kids with divorced parents nowadays, it’s nothing out of the ordinary and seeing her development I am sure you are handling it correctly. I am very happy you passed by to talk, please do so from time to time, I want to have a good relationship with my student’s parents.”

Mr.Jung, Hoseok is almost sure his name is Daehyun, talks a lot, but he’s very nice. Eunjin likes him much as far he knows and they talk some more about Eunjin’s ways of doing her homework and where Hoseok can help and where it’ll be better not to and some goals for the rest of the year.

He promises to meet again at some point the next month, declines Mr.Jung’s offer of biscuits and goes back to collect his daughter and go home. Cooking together is something he wanted to try for a long time and he tells Eunjin on the way home. She agrees and they stop to the grocery shop to buy the ingredients needed.

It’s messy and the kitchen is dirty and stained with sauces all over but he hears Eunjin laughing genuinely while being with him, for the first time in so long. She is laughing at him, face white from the flour he somehow managed to get on himself before putting the meat in it to season it.

He reaches to hug her, announcing he now is the flour monster and Eunjin doesn’t move away, she lifts her tiny arms and hugs back his waist, resting her head on his stomach. The food is edible and the bath afterwards is the most fun they had together in years.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading!


End file.
